Country roads took me home

Country roads, take me home
to the place, where I belong...

I heard this song in a taxi in Bangkok, two weeks before we left. It's the first time I thought about New York, and wasn't sure if it's the place where I belong.

Time is up. We have to go. But it's very sad.

The last few weeks in Bangkok involved numerous good-byes, send-off parties, friends to see, tears shed. I was not ready to leave yet. But it's time.

I made so many wonderful friends, whom I certainly hope to see again the future, just don't know where and when.

Then it was packing madness, wrapping up my Thai class, Chinese classes etc etc. My last day of both Thai and Chinese classes were two days before our flight.

It gave me the time to process "coming home" in the last 2.5 weeks of driving from San Francisco to New York. We saw many friends and family along the way, including friends we haven't seen for years. America IS beautiful. I never thought Idaho as a beautiful state, as I only knew of its potato. In Yellowstone, we saw both grizzly and black mother bears with their cubs. Brent was chasing a porcupine on the highway in Wisconsin and wanted to take a picture of it as it ran and climbed up a tree shaking. Beautiful snow mountains, quiet highways, clean air, all told me that we were in America the beautiful. Also we saw fat cows, big people, in contrast to the other world, telling me America has no indication of food shortage.

Currently in my parents home. Will find out how our own home is tomorrow. Then it'll take weeks to put our lives together. When my job search starts, I will know I am back.

Happy Water Splashing - Thai new year!

It's called Songkrang. And be prepared to get wet!

Today is the first day of the new year. Bangkok is almost deserted. Most people return to their home town to celebrate new year. For those who are native Bangkokers, or have no money to go home, we go out to paint the town - white. People would get on pickup trucks, or just stand by the sidewalk, and use their water fun or just buckets, to splash water on passerby. This splashing water symbolizes the leaving of the old, and coming of the new. Not only that, they would dip their hands in white baby powder, or some other gooy white paste, and rub them on anyone's faces. Some British (usually) older expats really hate this festival. They leave Thailand during this week and escape to other countries.

As we walked out of church today with a few friends and two three-year-olds, we were immediately greeted by a family, with the man rubbing white powder on our faces. And a kid started shooting water at us. One of our kids got shocked and started crying. This is their first Songkrang here and their parents left their water guns home. As we walked on, other kids started shooting at us. The little boy Owen with me wasn't very happy. I asked the street kids if we could borrow their gun. The older one said to wait for a moment. We followed him to where he's refilling his gun with water. Apparently he's the son of one of the car garage attendants. The adults got out a gun and handed to Owen. Once Owen started shooting at others, he laughed with joy. Soon his twin brother Bret arrived, and the garage attendant gave him another gun. The boys started having fun and didn't want to leave. As they were playing, their mother and I got wetter as other kids were shooting at us. And the garage attendants gave the guns to the boys as gifts.

On our way trying to get to a Chinese restaurant, more water was splashed on us. By the time we got to the restaurant, the boys were drenched (they are too small I guess). When we left the restaurant, some girls on the street were drenched, as they were pouring water on themselves trying to wash off the white paste on their faces. A British university intern with us got a big hand of white paste on her face. It is great fun! She's planning to go to Kaosan Road, the famous backpacker district tomorrow to do some serious water splashing with her colleagues.

I went to the Well yesterday to visit. The women ended work early and were hanging out, ready for the new year. I asked one woman Jane how she's doing. She answered back in very good English in such joy, "I am very very happy right now." I asked her why. She answered "because I have God. I am full inside, and I am also full outside!" She laughed as she was squeezing her own belly. (she's on the heavy side) She went on telling me that her husband died, and she was very depressed and turn to beer and whiskey. She was always angry and rude, and wasn't being responsible to her two young girls. She met one of the women Tina who has been coming to the Well. Tina invited her to come, but she's afraid that she wouldn't understand a thing that's going on, as she had been to temples before and sat their meditating and listen to monk talks, but she didn't understand what's being said and only felt more despair within. She said it must be God telling her to come to the Well. After she has come to the center, she felt so happy. Now she no longer needs beer and whiskey, and she is full of happy thoughts. Her daughters are with her now and she has learned how to speak politely to others. It's hard for me to imagine what she was like before, as every time I see her, she is full of smiles.

I hope that we can all have the fullness inside as Jane, on this new year's day and forever.

the evil and the everyday life in Cambodia

I can't say much about the genocide museum in Phnom Penh. Because I didn't go in. Because I didn't have the stomach to go in. Once I translated for a friend a page of a book describing how the Japanese raped and tortured a Chinese woman in Singapore, I started hyperventilating. Ever since, I can hear the screams of the victims without knowing their stories, and feel haunted by the shadow of their ghosts.

So I sat in a cafe across from the museum, while Brent spent two hours in the Tuol Sleng Genocide Museum. It is also called S-21, a high school converted to the torture and killing center of prisoners. He took some photos, and relayed a couple of stories of those who went through and died here. A woman from Phnom Penh was sent to the countryside to work, as millions of other city people. The peasants were called the "new people" by the Khmer Rouge and city people "old" (bad) people. The country women were jealous of this woman's fairer skin (because she wasn't working in the fields all day long) so they were always harsh to her, and would conspire to find fault in her. They would craw under her hut (on stilts) during her husband's once or twice a year visits and listened to their conversation. They would report back to the authorities. They eventually found fault with her, and she was sent to S-21. Her husband who was working for the Khmer Rouge at a low level was also sent there, but maybe they never saw each other in prison. She was tortured and killed.

Generally, we seem to have the notion that poor people and dark skinned people are the oppressed. But given the opportunity, they can certainly exercise the same kind of evil over the weaker. Kindness is not human nature.

Some prison guards were interviewed. Some showed remorse, and others didn't regret what they did at all.

On the surface, all this seemed to be a distant memory. People live for today. They are having as much fun as they can, even living dangerously. How they use transportation is a good example, especially how they use motorcycle as the main transportation vehicle - a family of 5 on 1 motorcycle, or two dead pigs on one.

More pictures from Laos and Cambodia:
http://share.shutterfly.com/action/welcome?sid=8CcsWbZsyZsUC&emid=sharshar&linkid=link4

Beauty - Laos and Cambodia visa run

As our previous visa was running out, we had to leave Thailand again to get a new tourist visa. I found that Vientiane, Laos is a good place to do that, also everyone I know who has been there loved it. Since we only have single entry visa, I decided it's a good time to get Angor Wat out of the way in Cambodia as well.

We loved Vientiane, Loas. It's very peaceful and people are very nice. Cheaper than Bangkok. We still had to haggle to get a more reasonable tuk-tuk fare. I never knew when to use the word "enchanting" but I would use it for Vientiane. But I heard from other trekkers that the countryside is even more simple and peaceful. It's the most laid back capital in the world, according to Lonely Planet, and I can't disagree more based on my traveling experience. There's not much going on, so it can get boring after a few days, but I was glad to soak up the peacefulness of the city and the riverfront and the smiles from vendors. They were trying hard to sell, but they don't make you feel harassed.

Then we went to Siem Reap, Cambodia to see Angor Wat. It's indeed amazing. Then we went to Phnom Penh for two days. But we didn't really like the country from what we had seen and experienced. It's very dirty, much worse than China, and in-your-face poverty, but hard to distinguish who is really poor and who are professional beggars. The children beggars really broke my heart but I only dare to give out food or drink. It's very expensive in Cambodia, because it's a dollarized economy. We babysat for a couple Saturday night who worked for NGO and lived in Phnom Penh for many years and they have a lot of wisdom on the culture and people and know who's really in need etc. The tuk-tuk drivers always wanted to rip us off as you would expect, and more aggressive than Bangkok. However I have high hopes for the country as well. All the beggars and tuk-tuk drivers speak English, at least the "business" English to make you feel guilty not giving them money or buy things from them. I think if their asset is channeled properly and the government corruption is eliminated, and people's dependency on foreign aid is lessoned, the country is going to be very strong.

What can I say about Angor Wat? It's some beautiful stones piled one on top of another. Looking at these three equally beautiful pictures, based on the theory that two of them result from a "big bang" millions of years ago, and the molecules had reactions with each other, and we now enjoy beautiful nature and human beings, I then can draw the conclusion that Angor Wat came about the same way. If one can argue that the creation story was just made up by foolish minds and cannot be used as evidence of how the world came about, then since there is absolutely no evidence other than folklores about Angor Wat being built, then the logically consistent conclusion is that Angor Wat was not built by anyone but resulted from natural causes.

Dialogs in Cambodia, usually with boys or girls who are 6-9 trying to sell me things:
Dialog 1.
Boy: Madame, please buy these bracelets from me. 1 dollar!
Lily: No, thank you. I can't take them.
Boy: You don't need to take them. You can wear them!
Lily: No, thank you. I don't need them.
Boy: Where are you from?
Lily: America.
Boy: America has 50 states, and the capital is Washington DC. The president is George W. Bush. etc. etc.
Lily: You study very well. Why aren't you in school today? Oh! It's Saturday! You don't have school.
Boy: Madame, in your country, you don't have school on Saturday. But in my country, we have school six days a week. But today is a holiday.
Lily: Do you know what day is today?
Boy: No.
Lily: You can learn something new today. Today is World's Women's Day.
Boy: OK. But please buy the bracelets from me.
..... Lily would like to buy them just to help him out, but cold-hearted Brent wouldn't let her....


Dialog 2 (on our way into a site)
Girl: Madame! Would you like some scarf? 1 for 2 dollars.
Lily: Mmm... No, thank you!
Girl: OK, ONE dollar.
Lily: No, thank you.
Girl: OK, but when you come back, you buy from ME, OK?!
Lily: OK.
.... (coming out)
Girl: Hi Madame, remember me?! Would you like to buy scarf?
Lily: (it's really not expensive and I can use it) OK, I'll buy one. (Looking through the scarves, and another girl comes up)
Girl2: Buy one from me too!
Lily: I can only buy one.
Girl2: OK. (looking resigned) Buy from her.
Brent (loudly): What do you need it for? You don't need any more stuff! (Pulled me away...)

I was very upset leaving there. No American nor most native English speakers can appreciate, kids at that age having to make a living, in a foreign language!

Baby face

Last night I met the youngest student at the Well(http://servantworks.org/well), who was working at the bars as a prostitute. She is now 13.

I have met quite a few baby faces like her. They are just girls. They are 13-15. They love to chat, laugh, pretty things. When I saw them, it's hard to imagine that they used to be selling their bodies, and it turns my stomach to think that some men would want to pay to rob their innocence. These men's daughters or granddaughters would have been older than them, and they would have been cat-fighting with their peers over some freckle faced boy in school.

These girls look just like normal girls, though compare to Caucasian girls, they are much smaller in stature and thinner. They mostly come from the very poor region of north-east Isan, with parents died young or being abandoned, or sold to be working in Bangkok to send money home. They all have too much life story for their age.

My heart was broken the first time I visited the Well, when I met Bo, a skinny bright faced happy girl of 14. She was very talkative, and of course I couldn't understand much. She was showing off the English words she learned that day, and she was also learning math. Her aunt was also there. I had thought her aunt was a prostitute and came to the Well, and brought her along. But later I found the contrary - Bo was working in the bars as a prostitute, and got rescued by the Well, and her aunt lost her husband and was devastated, and Bo brought the aunt to the Well.

I have visited the Well a couple of times now, and as my Thai is improving, I can hold a couple of minutes longer conversation with the girls. The girls are rough girls, I learned. They were street kids, and have to carry edges around them. Sometimes they would fight. At the Well, they learn English, math, and more importantly, God's love. They are not worthless as they have learned from their society and culture, but are absolutely loved by a father they never had. They start to learn to respect themselves and others.

Jim and Judy who have started the Well are amazing people. They have poured out their lives on it. It's definitely hard and heart-breaking work. Some girls would go back to their old life, as money does come much easier, and they have to feed their drug addictions which they acquired during their prostitution. They said they have learned that they can't change people, but all they learned is to love them, and love them more.

The Well's website is http://servantworks.org/well. And Jim's blog tells a lot more about what's going on.

The girls are learning a few crafts. The ones I've come to know more are all making jewelries. They have excellent workmanship, and the pieces are beautiful. Some of their work can be seen and purchased at http://narimon.org/.

Green trip

I think the French call field trips Green Trip.

Some classmates at our Thai school took a day trip to Kao Yai National Park, and then the wineries, two hours north of Bangkok. It was a fun trip.

The wineries area looked like Napa Valley, but looking closely, I saw the signs in Thai and knew I was still in Thailand.

Working hard in Bangkok

February has been and will be a hectic month. We didn't have visitors for three months, and then everyone decides to come in February. We have visitors every week, and I am busy entertaining, washing sheets, in between studying Thai and teaching Chinese.

After all this is third world. As much as my friends envy our "luxury" living, I wonder if they can be as creative as me to dry bed sheet on dining table. Dryer is non-existent, neither is coin laundry in this hood.

My hand hurts when I stay on the computer for more than 10 minutes. And I really can't answer everyone's email. My blogging is the only way to answer everyone's questions, such as where we are, what we are doing.

So I am working hard to try out another career. I've been teaching Chinese since November. I'm teaching in a Chinese language school. I applied at several schools and this one is the only one that is in shortage of teachers. But they only have two classes a week for me, which is sufficient for me to tell if I like it, but not sufficient to pay our utility bills.

I like teaching students who are eager to learn or disciplined. For students who have 1 second attention span, it's very challenging. My favorite was an 11-year-old French girl who is a student of another teacher. I taught her when her teacher went back to China for a month. She was like a sponge, and she studied in between classes. She speaks French, English, a little Thai and a little Chinese now. For siblings who study together, it's always a problem. I had two Korean brothers and have had two Thai sisters. The younger one is always the "lazy" one. The older ones would learn and know their stuff, but the younger ones would just tag along and be clueless, and then the older ones would despise the younger and call them "stupid". I still have the Thai sisters and they are really sweet girls. I have to find creative ways to have the younger one learn a little bit more without boring the older one. Somehow some parents have the notion that their kids are better learning together, maybe they get a discount. I don't know. Our landlord have twins, and they purposely separate them in school.

I always love teaching adults, except at my last job to someone who didn't really care to learn. I have an adult Thai student now who is really eager to learn. He is Chinese decent, and had lived in Singapore when he was young and learned some Chinese. Now he wants to pick up where he left off so he doesn't waste such a beautiful language.

Learning Thai has become more challenging. Keeping up the discipline to memorize the vocabulary and sentence patterns everyday is difficult. Strangely, finding someone to practice is also difficult in this Japanese neighborhood. We live in an inconvenient location that in order to reach the public transport, we have to take a taxi, or a long sweaty walk.

Brent is working hard on his trading project. He's currently busy writing an article for IBM that he needs to submit by mid Feb.

We will be back in New York in June. All good things have to end. We can only live on our savings for so long. I have to find a job that pays the bills.

Trouble in paradise

I saw an ad on the internet for English teachers. A Danish teacher (from Denmark) is leaving Thailand after teaching for some years and announced his vacancy. His ad apologized to all the Filipino teachers and said the owner doesn't want any Asian teachers, but any other non-native English speakers are OK. I posted a question to him and here's his reply: (my user name is "caydii")
=======================

Re:English teacher

LarsSorensen View Member Profile Add as Friend Send Message Add to PM block list Forward PM Find Member's Topics Find Member's Posts

Re:English teacher, Yesterday, 2008-01-11 18:02:32

Newbie Group: Members Posts: 1 Member No.: 56,299 Joined: 2008-01-03

Hi I did ask the owner of the school your question. (the owner is a Chinese lady) I first have to say this is the owners answer and does in no way reflect what I think about the "problem". Her answer was: The parents of the students want there kids to study with a "farang" (white) teacher, not an Asian. She have before said no to an African American and a American Chinese. I am very sorry to tell you this, and i don't understand it. I don't understand how a Chinese person can be a racist against Chinese people, but you see it all the time in Thailand. Regards and respect Lars QUOTE Hi, I saw your posting and was puzzled by the restriction the owner has on teachers. No Asian teachers? What does he mean? No Asian looking teachers? What if I'm an American Chinese who grew up in the US and speak just like a native? Would you ask him that? Thanks! caydii

Thank you, America!

We went to Koh Chang (Elephant Island) last weekend, to get some beach and fresh air after the holiday crowds and before my school started. It turned out to be my favorite island. Once we got there, we forgot about the painful long 7-hour journey we just took to get there (bus, pickup truck taxi, ferry, then pickup truck taxi again).

We stayed on Klong Prao Beach, which is a quieter beach, with some resorts and huts along the beach and quite a few restaurants right on the beach that are not charging rip off prices just because they are on the beach. Some swings are hanging from the tall trees, so that kids and big kids :) can enjoy swinging right into the water. The pictures should tell more than words...

The second day we took a snorkeling trip. On the same pickup truck that took us to the pier, there was a Korean man in his forties and his daughter. We only found out that they are Koreans after Brent started talking to the guy. When he found out that we are from America, he said "I am very grateful to America!" He said though the young people in Korea now don't like America that much, he is grateful because if America didn't fight the Korean war, south Korea wouldn't have been such a rich country. He kept on saying 'thank you' to us that we were speechlessly moved and I felt proud to be an American. I guess the man has traveled around and see that what South Korea would be like if they also lived under communist regime.

I am reading a fascinating biography on Mao (the 'great' leader of People's Republic of China). I just found out the reason why Korean war lasted so long, was because Mao kept on piping in Chinese "volunteer" army, and used it as an evidence to Stalin that he is able to be the boss of communist community of entire Asia, so that Stalin would give China the nuclear bomb he's been nagging for, so that he (Mao) can build a super power country and the world would listen to him. Kim Il Sung wanted to end the war two years before the war actually ended, because north Korea was in a shamble, and the country suffered huge human loss. But Mao, being appointed boss of Kim by Stalin, wanted to show his ability, directed Kim to continue the war, and his purpose was to drain and kill more Americans. He didn't care about Chinese lives, as there were plenty (in his own words), and he sent them to die, especially those he disliked (including a famous general who disagreed with him years before), and many soldiers who came from the Kwomintang army. Mao also ordered the POWs from the war returned to China being executed because they were "traders" that they were even captured.

It's rare to hear this kind of pro-America sentiments in the media these days. Even when we were in Shandong, my friends expressed that people there like America, and hate Japan, still. Shandong was occupied by Japan several times in the last hundred years and many were brutally tortured and killed.

The third day we went for elephant trecking before we said good-bye to the island. Our mahout was a bit crazy, probably half drunk, as he asked us during the ride if he could drink whiskey. He's very agile and he jumped from our elephant to the other elephant's back trying to scare the kids. He kept on pulling the tail of the elephant in front of us, and pretended it was a microphone and sang songs. I guess the elephant was not happy, because when he jumped from another elephant to her, she wiggled so he fell to the ground and scraped his arm! Thai elephants are half the size of African ones, about 3 meters tall, but they are gentler and smarter, and are tamed and used as farm hands. We loved touching their wiry hair. Even the baby elephant is 200 kg, so we wouldn't want to hold it.

It is 1/1/2008!

Just noticed my last posting was dated as December 31, 2007. Then found my profile location is in Afghanistan. Hello! I'm in 2008!

Happy New Year Bangkok

Watching fireworks going off everywhere in the city, I couldn't believe it's New Year's eve of 2008, and I am in Bangkok. It actually feels chilly, and I have to have my sweater on today, just like a Thai, when it's 26 degrees centigrade (78 F). Brent questions how I would survive after returning to New York. I don't know, but I will worry about it when it happens. I am preparing myself for the hot season here starting March, when it's going to be 40C (100F) and muggy everyday.

We celebrated New Year's eve at home with my cousin's family and a friend. Brent whipped up his specialty - spaghetti. It was pretty good despite of the poor quality electric stove and having only one pot to cook with that sticks all the time. The two little boys had the grandest time, doing ninja moves on each other, chasing each other non-stop, and taking turns to get shoulder rides from Brent.

2007 was an eventful and interesting year. It started with my never-going-away hand, arm, and back pain; improvement after staying home for a month and physical therapy; worsened pain after returning to work. This pushed me to seriously consider a career change. It wasn't an easy decision. I was quite good at what I did in my profession after all these years, and doing anything else would mean retraining and a big loss on income.

It would be impossible to live in New York on our savings. It would burn up so quickly that I would be forced to go back to the profession that hurts me so much in no time.

After two months of painful search for tenants for our apartment, we packed up and left for China.

There were highs and lows in our time in Asia, but for me, the highs are far outweighing the lows.

Lows:
1. Bureaucracy in visa office in China. But I heard that the American consulate in London is no better.
2. Mosquitoes, my #1 enemy while traveling, were having a feast on me in Yangtze south. Even in our apartment in Bangkok, once I forgot to put repellent on, I got ten bites in 10 minutes typing an email.
3. Rude drivers in Qingdao, could easily claim lives or limbs. I was angry everyday when I went out, as everyday I almost got hit. Bangkok has a lot more cars, but I feel so much safer. People actually yield.
4. The stares I got from women in China when I was walking with Brent, made me feel very uneasy. I no longer get stares in Thailand.
5. True, things don't always work properly here. Internet is slow, despite a high-speed plan. Taxis don't stop or refuse to take us when it's empty, is mind boggling.

Highs:
1. Generous uncles and aunts allowed us to stay in their homes in Shanghai, Hong Kong and Bangkok while we were traveling and searching for places to settle.
2. Cousins who kept their eyes out for apartments, patiently translate for us when I would call frantically in a taxi and couldn't communicate to the driver.
3. Reconnected with some friends whom I haven't seen for 19 years. I do feel having lived two lives already.
4. Visited some incredibly beautiful places in inland China, which I never knew existed before.
5. Met some very wonderful friends in Qingdao. Ran into a woman I met at a conference 15 years ago in Minnesota, then of course, a big dinner was waiting for us in her home.
6. Translated a contract for the 2008 Olympics sailing competition. Very proud to say that I have done something for the Olympics.
7. Having cousins spontaneously visit us when they were on their honeymoon in China.
8. Sharing meals with total strangers. Actually we didn't share, but our neighbors would offer for us to taste their food because we were so curious about what they were eating.
9. Have met some wonderful people in Bangkok, most of whom have lived in this region for many years. We are often invited to dinner in their homes, and learning the tips about living here.
10. While Brent was getting his $3 haircut in downtown Suzhou, I was teaching two young conscientious washers English phrases that they could use with their foreign customers. Teaching is fun when your students want to learn.
11. A Thai woman stopped me to ask for directions, and I understood and answered her.
12. 13. 14... The list goes on and on. I'd just stop here and provide links to places we visited but haven't posted pictures or forgot to bring our camera when visiting.
http://outdoors.webshots.com/album/134379031GuYEYl
http://www.thaiwaysmagazine.com/krabi/krabi_attraction_muang_county.html#ao_nang


By now, I still don't know what's next for me in terms of career. Learning Thai is fun and keeping me busy. Teaching Chinese to kids once a week is rewarding but not sufficient. I have a lot of figure out in the year to come.

Christmas in Bangkok

Picture 1 - Pristine Singapore
Picture 2 - also Singapore, Arab Quarter


I can't believe it's Christmas! It's been so long since I last wrote.

It's 33 degrees Celsius and sunny and it's the first warm Christmas I've ever had. I am very thankful for that.

Think back to the dreadful hand/arm injury and seemingly never ending physical therapy and acupuncture, which couldn't take away my pain, to a life away from computer, I am thankful.

Some have asked how my hand and arm is - I am mostly without pain, as long as I don't stay on the computer for more than half an hour or carry heavy stuff.

So many things happened in the last month and a half, so it's hard to remember to write down everything. I don't have the opportunity to write therefore less chance to injure myself again, because Brent has been working a lot (hogging the computer).

I am happy with the progress I've made in my Thai. I have been chatting with the cleaning lady, the taxi drivers, and the landlady. I can't understand everything they say, but I get the gist of it.

The shopping malls have been blasting Christmas music and singing about the Savior is born, without the worry of political correctness. It's ironic, since most people here are Buddhists. On the other hand, this music just becomes background noise, without meaning. Words have no meaning, without a personal relationship.

We were in Singapore three weeks ago for our second "visa run", and met up with an old friend Tara from New York. Tara is a scientist, and has moved to Singapore earlier this year. She noticed that in the highly educated science community, a lot more people are confessing Christians. Even in the society in large, people are not marginalized if they believe in God. In the States, in New York in particular, people were shocked that she believes in God, because she's a scientist, as if they should be mutually exclusive.

It rained hard in Singapore the first day we got there. As we always bring rain with us, it's become something to laugh about. It is as pristine as I remembered it 10 years ago, but I only went to the pristine places then. This time, thanks to my walking fanatic husband, we walked through Little India and the Arab Quarter, which gave me a glimpse of the "cultured" parts of Singapore, which actually makes it more interesting. Brent enjoyed the wide sidewalks and mostly clean streets, in contrast to Bangkok. On the other hand, he grew tired of it after four days and commented he was happy to be back in Bangkok afterwards. For some reason, December is the busiest time in Singapore and all the low to mid range hotels were booked. There were some very "reasonable" hotels, turned out to be in the Gaylong district - redlight district. I refused to stay there. My cousin was shocked that Singapore has redlight district. Human beings nature do not change even with an efficient government. We need a lot more than government and policies.

I was impressed by Singapore's recycling effort. See picture. And another picture that you would think belongs to New York City:)

I am getting to know my classmates who take Thai lessons with me. One bright eyed young woman is worth writing about. Anita is 22, from Ohio. She lived in northern India for a year, working with YWAM doing social working with some very poor women. She went back to the States for a year and waitressed to save up money, and came to Bangkok in October. She plans to stay here for two years, working with young women who were trafficed into prostitution because of poverty. This particular group is from Isan, a region very poor and looked down by Bangkok people. Many man and women came from Isan to work in Bangkok, to make some money to send home. Many women were tricked into coming to Bangkok, thinking they would be maids or factory workers, but only found out what their job would be after being locked up by the trafficers after they got here. Many of them have children back home. In order to pay off their debt, they feel they have no other way out except to do what makes the most money the fastest. Besides selling their bodies, they are often abused by their "customers" and forced to use drugs, which becomes an addiction which requires them to make more money to feed the addiction. Anyhow, Anita has never gone to college, and she had decided since high school that she wanted to find where her passion is, before wasting money in universities. She lives like a local, with no air conditioning in her place, as was in India.

We went to a couple of friends' home for a Christmas party last night (Christmas Eve) and met a group of Cubans. I chatted with a young Cuban woman. She's a musician and plays flute in a band. She just came to Thailand 3 to 4 months ago. When she heard that I came from China, she lamented - I wish my country is like yours! People in Cuba are so oppressed and blinded by Castro that they have nothing left by the end of the month, financially and emotionally. But at least Castro allows them to dance. This group exhibited the Cuban salsa, which has four pairs of dancers and they switch partner every few seconds. It's amazing to watch. The other Latin people who were not Cuban had to be kicked out, because they had no idea what to do!

Time to quit writing, before my hand starts to hurt...

What does a French, an Austrian, a Chinese and a Japanese in common?

Sawadii Ka!

We say ma, ma, ma, ma, ma together. All these "ma"s have different tones and mean different things. We are in the same Thai language class.

I've been learning Thai for 6 days now, and I can finally say a few sentences and initiate a simple conversation with the cleaning lady. It's been frustrating not being able to communicate, and I feel really good about learning the language of the land.

We have 8 students in the class, but the four of us women like to hang out a little afterwards and have lunch together, and complain about how difficult it is to learn Thai. Both the Japanese and I have arrived in Thailand 1.5 months ago, and the French has been here for 2 years and the Austrian has been here for 9 years and finally decided to learn Thai. The French has been working in Asia for the last 10 years and lived in Vietnam for 4 years, China for 2. She never learned Vietnamese, but could understand and speak a few words, so it's even more confusing to her because the same sound means different things in Vietnamese, Chinese and Thai. She recently quit her job and is taking some time to learn Thai.

It's fun to share the cultural differences. One story the French told us happened at her company here in Thailand. The French usually greet their friends and family with kisses, but at business settings, they just shake hands. But since everyone is far away from home here, they kiss each other too, even with clients. But once some clients came and one guy is the president of the company, who is a really big shot, so they would kiss him, but just to shake hands. Her Thai female coworker thought kissing was the proper French way, so when the clients were leaving, she went ahead and kissed the president. The president was so kind that he turned around to my French classmate, and said to her, "let me kiss you too then", so he kissed her too, to save any embarrassment the Thai women would have. I don't know if anyone ever explained to her when it's proper to kiss and when it's not.

"Face" is very important here, and that's why Thais are always smiling and being very polite to each other, though there must be ways to put each other down too. So the difference between Thailand and China is - the Chinese would rip you off with a straight face, the Thais will rip you off with a smile and you walk away happy!

We visited a small mission church last weekend. There were mostly Thai, with a temporary American pastor, so a translator is needed. There were also a couple of Americans going there regularly. They were in the process of hiring a Thai pastor and one candidate was available. One American lady asked - "since some of us here don't speak Thai very well, is he (the candidate) willing to learn English?" What a strange request! I almost blabbed out - maybe it's time for you to learn Thai! It's his country you are staying in.

5-star service

A week ago, I arrived at the building by motorcycle taxi, a thrilling thing to do in Bangkok. It wiggles through all the traffic jams. Three men with umbrellas came up and shaded me from the sun and escorted me through the automatic door. The lobby smelled like lavender.

Is this Mandarin Oriental? Nope. It's a hospital. I never thought I would smile going to a hospital. I went for a routine procedure. In New York, I would have to set an appointment 1-2 months ahead of time. Here, I called the day before, and I went in the next day. All the staff were in clean and neat uniforms and smiled at me. I checked in at the front desk, just liking checking into a hotel. When I got to the destination, someone came up and smiled and asked what I was there for.

I have no insurance, and have to pay out of my own pocket. The procedure cost less than $90, and the doctor's fee was $17, less than my co-pay in NY. In NY, they would send a thousands of dollars bill to the insurance company, to cover everything plus the doctor's insurance against lawsuits. And the doctor informed me that I would know the result in one hour (vs. a week in NY), and they have a cafeteria downstairs. I was guided by a nurse's assistant to where I could see the escalator to the cafeteria. There are shops and bookstore along the way. The cafeteria had healthy salad or burgers for the farangs (foreigners), and noodles, curries etc.

My result was questionable, so the doctor had her nurse check the schedule of the specialist. I got an appointment for that day, at 6:15pm.

I never thought I could smile going in and out of the hospital, but I did.

My cousin's wife's parents lived in California. Her father came down with liver cancer and passed away within weeks. She was going to bring him to Bangkok for treatment, (her mother always comes to Bangkok for medical treatment) but he deteriorated so fast that they didn't have a chance. He stayed in Stanford Hospital, and the daily rate was $6K+. If not for medicare, he couldn't even receive morphine in the end of his life.

What about the poor people here? I heard they can go for free care in public hospitals. The wait is a bit long, at least they will be treated. No wonder people take their king so seriously here. He is a respectable man and visits remote places where no other officials would remember. Before any movie or show starts, people stand up to a song that's written for the king.

In China, a continuation of the story of the maid's son - he is in that good province level high school and is working hard. He gets up at 5 am every morning, and when his mother called him one night at 11, he still had an hour to go, and he needed to do his laundry. By hand of course, no washing machine in the dorms. I hope he gets into university...

Picture time - this is sunset at the end of monsoon from our window.

Hello Bangkok!

We left Hong Kong on a very "peaceful" note. We packed and repacked out luggage and weighted and calculated carefully which ones to check in. We were able to fly without paying any penalty! I love Hong Kong every time I go there. Good food, polite people, endless shopping... even though I hate shopping.

We have been staying at my aunt and uncle's house and received numerous generosity from them and cousins. We spent the last four days searching for an apartment. They said we could stay in the house for as long as we want. It is a big house but it is in the outskirt and if you don't know what traffic jam is until you come here. Last night, we saw the biggest monsoon in our lives. It poured and poured and didn't stop till 11 am this morning. Brent went out for a walk (I didn't like walking in dirty flooded streets, I mean really dirty as tons of street dogs roam around), and at one point of the street, it was connecting to the swamp and flooded and fish were swimming on the street river. Anyway come back to the traffic - we had dinner with two friends (will talk about them next) and one offered us a ride home as it was pouring and he lives 10 minutes away. It's usually a 30 minute drive, it took us over 90 minutes to get home.

Back to the apartment search. The house we are staying in is a big old house, and no internet (I'm in an internet cafe in THE MALL) and it has a yard like a tropical jungle. I stood in front of the door talking to my uncle for two minutes, and got a mosquito bite on my toe! I put repellent on mind you. Dangee fever is bad right now and the mosquitoes carry them feed during the day too...

OK, apartment. Since the dollar has devalued to the Baht, the rent here is more expensive than before, to Americans. We looked at so many apartments and our head spinned. Nice ones are expensive, even the ones that are not cheap would have roaches or crumbs on mattress. Ha, shows us that we don't have kids. Or some are in sleazy streets with tons of bar-girls hanging out. We received quite a bit of help from my cousins and their friends, as we don't speak Thai and less people than foreigners think speak English to a level that can understand our needs (such as wired high speed internet, not wireless etc). One friend Sam took us across the river to the building he used to live in. And then my cousin's wife called two days ago and said Sam mentioned a friend Ray in their church has two apartments for rent, though they are far from public transit, he would rent them out to us for cheap. Ray wasn't around till yesterday to show us the apartments. One of them was a penthouse unit with great view. He would rent it to us at less than 1/3 of market price which meets our budget! It's more than what we could have imagined or asked for. God is good!

Ray is a business man and used to be very superstitious (in his own words). When he heard about any new pretty temple coming up, he would go to pay respect. Then something happened to his family two years ago and he became a Christian. He sees now that all his possessions are gifts from God, and he gives them out generously and doesn't hold back. So we hope our friends come to visit and stay with us, that we can spread this grace around.

Goodbye China, hello and goodbye Hong Kong

It was a whirl wind of two weeks of traveling in China and then HK. Went to the "river south" of China and saw many beautiful things. Also got giant mosquito bites. They had to eat too. I was "glad" to contribute to their reproduction.

Felt good to leave China, only because the girl at the airline counter would give us a break, and we got a luggage overweight penalty that amounted to half of my plane ticket! I kept on telling people, please please don't give me anything, I can't carry it. Everyone said, oh, just a little something, then it added up and they charge by the kilo!

HK is much more organized and civilized. I hate to be singing praises to the Queen but we don't need to worry about being hit by a car any more crossing the street. The cars actually stop for the lights.

Miss China for its prices. HK is much more expensive.

People think it's so "cool" and romantic to travel around for a year. Actually it's a lot more pain then we realized. We thought we carefully picked out what is needed for a year, but since we weren't sure where we'd really be (though Thailand preferred, but there has been visa difficulties to the foreigners), we had to pack up quite a bit. Then there's weight limits. In Asia, you can only check in 20kg! (a little over 40 lbs) It's not easy task, but when I see how Americans pack their cars to the rim to travel, I wonder if they can survive this. There's something to be said about minimumlism (I made up that word).

Leaving very early AM tomorrow for Bangkok. Now Thailand doesn't allow anyone going in without a plane ticket leaving the country, I had to scramble to buy tickets going to Penang, Malaysia in 4 weeks. The joy and challenge of this trip!

Good-bye Qingdao and on the go again

We packed up and left Qingdao on September 20, on a stormy rainy day. The big tropical storm hit Qingdao the night before and many roads were flooded. We asked the hotel staff (the building we stayed in is part hotel and part apartments) to book a taxi the night before for us. After the boys loaded the car with our luggage, they were soaked already. Five minutes into the road, the driver started her business talk - "Let's set a price! Look, the roads are all flooded and it's hard to drive. Give me Y150." I replied, "are you kidding! this is an over the top price!" She came down, "OK, 130." I said "that's still over the top". She said "my car's starting price is 10, not 7, and it's Y1 extra for each km". I didn't say anything, just hoping to get to the airport on time. Good thing we started early. Roads were truly flooded, and she was constantly on the phone talking to other drivers inquiring road condition. The radio was saying not to hit the break in the water, just let the car slide, so it wouldn't halt. Many cars halted in the flood. So, it took an hour to get to the airport instead of half an hour. I gave her 130 and let her know that though it was over the top, it was a difficult drive.

Bargaining is a very big part of most Asian life, and it's fun when you shop, but it is not when you are under the pressure to be somewhere before a certain time!

We stopped in Shanghai for a day and then went to Nanjing to visit my aunt and cousin. My cousin's daughter is in Junior in high school. This part summer vacation, she was in school most of the time studying second year university chemistry, so that she can take part in the high school chemistry competition next year. Many students are studying some college subjects at this point. Some parents send their kids, they are all only-childs in their family by the way, to other countries (like America, Europe and Singapore) for a year of study. It's shocking to me to learn that because most parents I met before hold on to their child so tight and don't want their child to leave their sight, yet these parents are willing to let their child go to a faraway land and they won't see them for a year. When these students return to China, they have to repeat that same year because China's school covers so much more material and subjects that they wouldn't be able to follow. My cousin's daughter didn't want to go because she didn't want to be a year older than her classmates when she returns. Now she's regretting a little after seeing her friends return. But too late now!

the hardworking and the smart

It's hard to get hold of the computer to blog these days as Brent has been hogging it, actually he has been working hard.

The first picture is my college classmate whom I haven't seen since I left China and continuously invited me to visit him in Jinan. Jinan is a city full of springs, and by the Mother River of China - Yellow River. It turned out that he's actually very busy. He works basically seven days a week. He manages large engineering projects and often goes on business trips. However he squeezed time to show us around Jinan. He treated us to dinner the first night, but after he sent us to the hotel, he went on to interview someone whom they wanted to hire, at 11PM at night. It's definitely a different business culture. His colleagues took the engineer candidate to dinner, and they drank beer. When they were half drunk, the candidate signed the contract. As the chief, my friend needed to show up to work out the logistics. Chinese is all about food!

The second picture is hard to see clearly. It's supposed to be that way, as the man is setting up an illegal net to catch the sparrows. The net lines are so thin so it's hard to see. And he set it up in front of the trees because he knows the birds would fly to land on the branches. One sparrow was already caught!

The third picture here shows some workers making a road in the Yellow River park. They do everything by hand. This looks like as back breaking as building the Great Wall. (well, Great Wall has much larger stones actually) The dinner we had the night before probably would cost their whole month's salary.

Visa extended

After waiting for another two hours in the visa office, we got our turn. Besides for forms we filled in, the woman gave me a blank piece of paper and told me to write a statement that we wanted to extend our visa. She said the policy is to only extend 1 month, unless you are visiting "direct relatives" - parents, children or spouse. I wonder if I could have lied, but it's really a bad idea, as lies will come back to eat you.

I have posted some selected pictures. They are in random order and I don't want to hurt my hand to organize them. So bare with it!

http://share.shutterfly.com/action/welcome?sid=8CcsWbZsyZsTe

The smart, the dumb, and the expats

- The smart
This picture was taken at No. 1 Bathing Beach in Qingdao. There's no room to put down a towel or swim. Suppose there are only 0.1% people are smart, how many smart people can you pick out from this crowd? And this is only a small fraction of the Chinese population. Therefore I have to agree with a couple of friends' opinion on "Olympic math" which I mentioned in a previous posting. They think this kind of education is only used to allow kids to be a step ahead of others, because there are too many people to compete against. It doesn't really give them more knowledge, nor necessarily help them think better. One friend who is a high school chemistry teacher said that the chemistry the students learn today is much inferior than what we learned in our days. The education system now only emphasize on certain subjects like math just to make their students having higher scores than others. In the old days, only the cream of the crop could go abroad to study. Now, mostly kids who can't get into good universities here go abroad, if their parents have the money to pay.

- The dumb
I walked into a high end furnishing showroom, which has Italian design kitchen, bath and room furnishings. I was particularly intrigued by some toilets, especially the ones that looked like having very small water tanks. I asked the salesman if the volume is an issue. He replied no. He told me that the workers who put these up in their showroom, thought these were real toilets, so they started using them! Of course it's not connected to the sewage. They were ordered to pour the waste out and the contractor company had to buy the used toilets. These workers all come from the countryside, and none of them has a toilet at home or even has used one.

- The expats
I've met a few expats from all over the world who work and live here. I'm fascinated by them. One young man came from Wales, Mr N. He was a physics grad from Manchester, but couldn't find a job. After working as a pub chef for a year, he couldn't take it any more. He got an opportunity teaching English in Chengdu, China, and came happily. He subsequently got a job in the English magazine here, and teaches guitar part time. He loves Qingdao. I called this magazine two weeks ago and asked them if they need a freelance translator, they said sometimes. I went in and met with one of the young American editors and had an interesting chat. To have an English magazine is a huge challenge, which I can't go into details. It's a money loosing business, but the chief editor is a persistent person and wants to make the magazine a success. After being closed down for no reason twice, (he was still paying his Chinese staff salary during the close down), it has the status of the only official English magazine in town.
Another Mr Z from Germany is a character. He doesn't read or speak much Chinese but he's adventurous. He tries all kinds of food - he just points and then we eat. Two Sundays ago we went to a Korean restaurant and he ordered everything on the menu and claimed they were all good. It turned out to be either pig feet or some quite spicy food. I was ok with that, but most people didn't eat much. I heard a story about him from someone else. Once Mr. Z suggested to the group that he knew a good Israeli restaurant and has good Jewish food. A friend Ms. C who is a local here had never heard of it in her life. So they went. Ms. C thought it's strange since it doesn't look like anything Israeli though she has never been to one. She saw the sign of the army and thought it's a government owned restaurant. Mr. Z pointed to a symbol and said it's a Jewish symbol. But Ms. C said it's a symbol for the founding date of the military. The waiter came and gave them the menu. He got impatient and left after waiting for a minute while these foreigners discussing about what to order. After waiting for half an hour, the waiter never came back and some people got impatient so they all left! So now everyone is a little weary when Mr. Z suggests a restaurant:) But he did take us to a fantastic gelato place.
Then there's the lively French girl Madame A, who is selling French wine here. It's a lot of work and the distributor she's working with doesn't have too much experience. They work six days a week and the distributor's two male staff live in the office. The distributor was somehow responsible for her housing and they tried talking her into sharing the same apartment with the guys and live in the office. She of course insisted that she's living elsewhere and her husband was arriving. She speaks excellent Chinese. Her husband who is an English teacher in France just landed last week and got a teaching job that night!